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Holy Crap! When Did I Get Old?

With my birthday right around the corner, it has me thinking about gettin' all old and stuff. I've never been one of those girls that freaks out about turnin' twenty something or even thirty. Actually, I couldn't wait to get older. With every passing year I've gotten to watch my kids grow into intelligent smart assed little people and my relationship with J has gotten stronger and awesomer year after year. Gettin' older has never been any sweat off my back.

HOWEVER, every year around my birthday I tend to get a little down. Up until recently, my birthdays have never been more than a mere blip on a radar that no one really ever paid much attention to. So after years of my birthday going hardly even noticed, I started to dread the day. Not because I was a year older, but because no one (except maybe my mom) gave a rat's ass to celebrate my life. Um, yeah, I totally think my life is worth celebrating, just like everyone else's should! So, I guess I did have a party every year, it was just my very own personal pity party. (Yeah, I'm totally lame. What of it?!? I also cry damn near every time I watch Grey's Anatomy).
In the last few years though things have really turned around. J does love me! He really, really does! He's not just a dumb damn boy. Not only have I had a surprise party, I've had two surprise parties! Yeah he didn't plan the first one, but he kept the secret and he got me there and suffered the entire day because he had plans (albeit fake plans) that I didn't want to do on MY day dammit. The second surprise party was all him. He had some help, but he did it and it was AWESOME. J, you're AWESOME and I love you even if you got a fat head.
Now, back to this whole gettin' older thing. It just so happens that my birthday coincides with the time that cooler dryer air comes around and this cooler dryer air wreaks total freakin' havoc on my skin. Not that my skin doesn't suck on a daily basis anyways, but it WAY sucks when autumn gets here. It gets all dry and peely and cracky. Yeah, and I'm talkin' about the skin on my freakin' FACE. It totally blows.

For many many years, I've just used whatever cheap crap I could find at Walmart to clean and moisturize my face. I didn't care what the hell it was as long as it took the layer of schmootz off my face that I apply every morning. Apparently, my Walmart stuff ain't cuttin' it anymore. It's time to bring in the big guns. That means.......I gotta go to the MALL. Dammit. I HATE the mall, but the mall is where I hear all the good face type stuff is.

So, I'll head to the mall. I'm gonna put on my nose plugs and head towards the hideous smellin' perfume/makeup department that always gives me a headache of gargantuan proportions and I'll stand there in the middle and scream out for someone to help me. I'm sure all those snooty ass makeup type bitches will all come-a-runnin'. I mean hell.....don't I totally look like I got thousands of dollars to spend? Yeah, maybe not, but I got plans dammit and I plan on droppin' some serious bucks on this purdy ol' face of mine if I have to. I maybe be turnin' a year older, but this mug o' mine ain't gonna look any damn older if I have anything to do with it!

Yeah, so take THAT stupid face!

Comments

Stitchblade said…
Happy almost your birthday...oh and guess what...I have NEVER had a birthday party....ever.
Loopy said…
Hahahh! Ok,
1. Yep. I totally put on my list "nice" moisterizer. And I've been studying up Anti-aging crap.
2. Holy shit, by third decade bday is in 2 wks also! GOOO Fire Signs!
Happy Birthday! I really love the philosophy line of products...they aren't cheap but they are fab!

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