Rich and Famous. That's What I'm Gonna Be.

Not quite a year ago, I was an extra in Rob Zombie's Halloween II. I said I'd never do that again and by THAT, I meant be an extra in a movie. It was just shy of torture.

Once the movie came out, the reviews sucked. Imagine that. Not that I'd go see even if the reviews were good.....I ain't into them kinda movies, BUT I would've gone to see it if I knew I was in the movie. To see myself on the silver screen.....ahhhh.....

A local theater held a screening of the movie for all the extras and I had several friends go, but to my utter disappointment they each said I wasn't in the movie....none of us were....well one guy saw his left arm.....lame.

Here it is months later and H2 is out on DVD. I got an email from a friend who was going frame by frame (because she's lame like that she says) and there's a nanosecond where the only thing on the screen is my face. No f-in' WAY!!! Of course I went straight out to rent the movie.

By the time I get home, I have another email from someone else telling me the same thing. Sweet baby jesus.....I'ma be famous!

I suffer through the first part of the movie and get all excited when the scene comes up that I should be in. The main character is at the party and she's all freakin' out and things are lookin' all wonky.....I'm watchin' and watchin' and watchin' and...holy SHIT.....right in the middle of her seein' shit all crazy.......there I am.........



.....and I'm totally singin'....and not along with the music that's playin', but that totally ain't my fault....I ain't the one that pieced that shit back together and put it on screen.....


Rewind, pause, frame by frame, rewind, pause......

Millions upon millions (ok, the movie sucked so maybe thousands upon thousands) get to see my face and wonder...."who's that awesome chick that's all over my t.v. screen?" Sha.....It's totally me.

After about thirty minutes of rewind, frame by frame, pause, I continue on with the movie and....HOLY SHIT.....there I am AGAIN! This time super quick flash of me all lookin' the same. Rewind, frame by frame, pause.

Jeremy and my friend Chewy gotta be irritated so I continue on with the movie. Ahhhh....my fifteen minutes.....seconds....half seconds....whatever.

As the scene goes on, the main character and one of her friends heads outside and I'm tellin' Jeremy and Chewy how insanely awesome the outside of the party was and....HOLY SHIT.....there I am AGAIN....hangin' out by the stairs....pretendin' I'm drinkin' a beer and freezin' my ass off.....

My fifteen half seconds of fame has totally turned into 20 half seconds of fame.

Rich and Famous. That's what I'm gonna be.

I've decided I'm moving to Hollywood to pursue a movie career and I'm expectin' the offers to start rollin' in at any minute. As a matter of fact, I just missed a phone call from a number I didn't recognize....they didn't leave a message, but I'm certain they're gonna call back and I'll have my first leading role.....