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A Man

On my way into work this morning I saw a man, an obviously homeless man, walkin' down the street. I was stopped at a light so I watched him as he walked by. Where had this dude's life gone so horribly wrong that he doesn't have a place to hang his hat? A place to wash all his bits? In general, homeless people piss me off, but when I see an old dude who's hasn't had a clean shave or even a bath in lord knows how long, I kinda feel bad for him. Where did this man's pride go or is it his pride that's kept him on the streets? I dunno.

I can't say I feel the same for homeless women though. Old ladies just creep me out. It stems back to when I was in 3rd grade, and I've never gotten over it. My whole Brownie troop went to an old folks home on Valentine's Day to hand out these little felt hearts we had sewn. My little 3rd grade self went walkin' up to an old lady in a wheelchair to hand her my heart. She yanked that shit outta my little 3rd grade hands and chucked it back at me sayin' "I DON'T WANT YOUR FUCKIN' HEART!" Holy GAWD.....Amazingly, I didn't cry. I stood frozen to the spot right there in front of her as my hand sewn heart bounced off my little 3rd grade forehead. I didn't wanna give that crazy broad my heart either.....she smelled like pee. What a bitch. Thanks to her, I'm not such a fan of old ladies. That shit's stayed with me my entire life. We all know women are nuttier than squirrel shit and it only gets worse as they get older. I prefer to just stay away from 'em thank you.

Older men on the other hand, I've always had a thing for. Not in a "I wanna bang old men" sorta way (ewww), but in a "I know they gotta story to tell" sorta way. You know the sayin' "A picture's worth a thousand words?".....well, to me, a old man's picture is worth a thousand words.
Real men are an endangered species. There's been a serious case of pussification in today's men and I think it's disgusting. Men are supposed to WORK. They're supposed to have gnarly workin' man hands. They're supposed to know how to fix cars. They're supposed to stand up for their women and take care of their families. You can just look at most any old man and see the road he's taken. He's gone to war and fought to keep his country safe. He's gone to work even though he had pneumonia. He made sure his wife and family felt safe and taken care of. When things sucked ass, he didn't complain, he just motored through, because he was a freakin' MAN. (I know there are some old dudes that really suck ass and deserve to take buckshot to the nuts, but let me have my fantasy).

For many, many years, I've said I was gonna start takin' pictures of old dudes. There's just somethin' about the lines in their faces and their hands (which is the best part on a man) and there's just so much a photograph could say.


I remember you talking about that years ago. I think you should do it!
Organic Meatbag said… I feel like one of those "pussified" guys you were talking about...hehehehe...
I will do it one day. It's just a matter of findin' the old dudes and askin' their permission. You now how I hate talkin' to people.
It's never too late to change Meatbag so you better get on it!
Anonymous said…
I TOTALLY agree, I'm not in need of someone to take care of me, but damn it's nice to have someone who will stand up for yardwork...get his hands on cars...fix things...clean out the drains in the shower when I won't touch it (the same goes for the garbage disposal)...and not that I'm afraid of bugs (I will kill them if I'm alone) but he'll kill them for me when I scream. It's really nice to be dating a REAL man!!

Tori said…
awesome post...

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