Yee HAW! Gonna Meet the Pioneer Woman Tonight!!!

****SECOND UPDATE****

Pioneer Woman won't be speakin' tonight. Only signin'.

****UPDATE**** 2:30 p.m.

Just called Borders. Pioneer Woman has moved signing up to 6:00 p.m. Boarders started handin' out colored wristbands at 9 this mornin' to guarantee your spot in line. YOU MUST HAVE A WRISTBAND!!! They're now on they're THIRD color of wristbands, and have never used more than one color at any other book signing! I had planned on gettin' there around 4ish so I could have a decent spot in line, but after this whole wristband thing, I ain't goin'.....sad face..... Ain't no way in hell I can sit in line until what is at this point gonna be 1 or 2 a.m with a whole bunch of mom bloggers all talkin' about baby snot and shit.....dammit....lame. I was SOOOOO excited!!!

Dear Ree,

I love your blog, like a whole lot. I love your kids faces and Marlboro Man's too. I love your funny way of writin', all your pretty photos and especially the recipes, because well....I love food. I will get your cookbook. I really, really wanted to meet you and have our picture taken together....we both have red hair (you did at least up until recently!) and we could totally make hair babies......but I just gotta get home at a decent time. I work and if I don't get enough sleep, I am one crabby, bitchy broad and my boss don't like that. Also there is this issue I have with bein' around a bunch of gloatin' mom bloggers....they make me wanna poke my eyeballs out. I just can't do it.

Go eat at the Varsity.......get a chili slaw dog and a pc. Good shit I tell ya, good shit.

I'm so sad.

Love,

Jessica

A year or so ago a Brandy over at Not So Average Mama told me about this blog called The Pioneer Woman. She said it was all about this lady who lives on a ranch somewhere and does ranch type stuff....it was really interesting, and I really needed to check it out.

Lame. That's what I thought, but what Brandy says to do, I pretty much do.

She was right. Once I started readin', I couldn't stop.

There were some of the most beautiful photos I'd ever seen and an entire section with photo tips....which I totally haven't tried, because just readin' them alone makes my brain go all fuzzy....that and I don't have the photo editing program she has.

I was immediately hooked on her Black Heels to Tractor Wheel series, which tells the story of her (who at the time, was a chick who was raised in a golf course community and was probably a total spoiled brat) and her rancher husband meetin' and fallin' in love. A city girl meets and falls in love with a cowboy. Ugh.....I'm SUCH a sucker for love stories.

So reminded me of my love for Lucchese boots.....and because of her, I have my very own pair and wear them as much as humanly possible.......

I've also cooked several things in her cookin' section. My favorite is the Crash Hot Potatos.....best shit ever.......

Hope she doesn't mind...I totally stole this picture from her site.

Last Christmas, Jeremy and I were using her recipe for beef tenderloin and he suggested we do somethin' a specific way and I can remember sayin', "No! That's not how Pioneer Woman said to do it!" I knew then that I had a problem.

I've actually cooked quite a few of her recipes and now, in addition to her Tasty Kitchen recipe site, she's put out a cookbook.......AND..........she's totally gonna be in Atlanta for a book signin' TONIGHT and I'm totally goin'!

In case you're wonderin', she'll be at Borders on Peachtree Road in Atlanta tonight at 7:30.

Because I'm TOTALLY Awesome Like That!

Today I was checkin' out the Cake Wrecks Blog and it was about my favoritist feline EVER (actually the only feline I like)...... HELLO KITTY ! WOW, there are some pretty shit cakes out there claiming to be Hello Kitty cakes. One even looks like Porky the freakin' Pig. The very last cake she wrote about tough is a cake I have worshiped forEVER . The first time I saw the HK zombie cake was on this site called Hello Kitty Hell which was a site I learned of when a friend of mine had sent me an email saying she'd seen one of my tattoos online. At first I thought "WHAT!?!?!? Really? Which one? Are they makin' fun of the big ass nekkid blue fairy that covers my ENTIRE back?" No, it couldn't be....no one even sees that tattoo.....ever. I clicked the link she had sent me and it took me to a fantastic place called Hello Kitty Hell . Wha? I ain't ever seen this place before! The dude who writes it says he's married to a crazed maniac of a wife that must h...

13 Roses 13 Dollar Tattoos!

Y'all have been lookin' for it and here it is! Yes , 13 Roses in Atlanta is gonna have another $13 tattoo (plus lucky $7 tip!) this upcoming Friday the 13th! Turn one of the unluckiest days of the year into your lucky day! You got a $20 bill, you gotta tattoo...... Q & A What does $20 get you? A kick ass tattoo by a kick ass artist. On the 13th, the shop will put on the front door a sheet of paper that has the tattoos you can choose from. Don't expect a half sleeve dipshit. It's a $20 tattoo!!! See that 13 on my arm? That's what I got last time..... ....and this taco (mmmm tacos)....it's what I got another time..... and that shit's a coupon at Holy Taco in East Atlanta....yep....a coupon. Does it just cost $13 for the tattoo? No asshat.....it's $13 tattoos with a $7 tip......$20. You got more than 2o dolla....tip more. Can I pick any tattoo I want? N o. Like I said before....they'll post a sheet of paper with what you can choose from on the front...

In the Car

Everyday this week, I've had to bring the kids to work with me. Since they're completely terrified of me (psht), they've kept their little kid selves in line. On the way to work this morning, the girl taught the boy how to hand crochet. He was pretty hesitant at first, because "boys don't do that kinda crap"....that's until she told him of her grand plan to make 'em and sell 'em to the people I work with. The second money was involved, he was all in. In less than 10 minutes, he was well on his way to making his first hand crocheted scarf. It's amazing what can get accomplished in the hour and a half it takes to get to work. By the time we arrived, the boy had completed his very first scarf. All I can seem to get accomplished is drinking coffee..... Mmmm.....Starbucks. I totally thought I was over it. I was wrong. So, how is the girl's grand plan goin' you might be wondering. Uh yeah.....she's made $32 so far. As for the boy,...

'Cuz I Felt Like It!

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