Skip to main content

So I've Been Thinkin'....

I've totally decided that I want another kid. WHA?....you say. Yeah, I do......then the sensible side of me kicks the shit outta the side of me that's havin' some weird puppy dog syndrome action a' happenin' and I snap out of it.

It's just that I have friends that are birthin' babies and it makes me really, really want another one. Our boy is about to be 14 and he hasn't wanted to have anything to do with us for a LONG time....and the girl, she's still attached to me at the hip...she MUST have smuggle time every night, but I sense it coming to an end soon and that's gonna make me cry.
I really think I'm losin' my mind. You think they got a medicine for this problem? I mean really, I know better. Kids cost a shit ton a money. They argue and make you wanna throw 'em in trash cans. They produce big fat terds that are always cloggin' the toilet. They lie about doin' homework. They complain about everything.....so no...I really don't want another kid.....but....then again.....
They're awesome. They have crazy weird thoughts that're tons of entertainment and you can make shit up to tell 'em so they have even more bizarre facts and opinions in their heads. Putty in your hands they are, putty in your hands. They also look to you as their parents for everything in their little child lives. Everything. They got questions, you're the first person they're gonna ask. They're living breathing beings that you and the person you love the most (if you're lucky enough) made together that you get to watch grow into awesome little humans......

Then they grow up, move away and you never hear from them, because they got better shit to do then call their mom and dad. SO....I think I should be poppin' out a kid every 6-8 years until I'm like 65. That should keep me with a youngin' until I die....right? Not empty nest issues for me!
THEN the sensible side says "you're fuckin' nuts Jessica.....nuts. You know how much that shit'll cost you? Not just in money, but sanity!".....So, no...I know that deep down I really don't want anymore kids. I just wanna borrow a baby every now and again. That's all. Borrow a baby.

Then I see this....and I've changed my mind again. I do want more kids.
I mean really? A Hello Kitty maternity ward?

Shit...that means I'd have to have a kid in Japan though and I'm not sure that I'd ever leave Japan once I got there. Can you imagine how much Hello Kitty shit there is there? and the shoes? The shoes in Japan...my word the shoes.
I'm an idiot. So what? Not like I could have a baby even if I really, really, really, really wanted to. Just not possible. Well, maybe....that shit is reversible right?

Comments

Anonymous said…
I hear it is reversible; but not sure if I heard that about the dude's procedure or the lady's. You WOULD want to have a baby in a Hello Kitty-themed maternity ward! ;)
Anonymous said…
Nope! Not for me!
Madame Jen said…
Your kids lie about their homework too??? I thought it was just mine!!! lol

You know I had my kids kinda early... and I'm feel'n ya here because a lot of my friends just now are starting to have babies.

I don't know that I could start all over again. I'm greatful knowing my kids can tie their own shoes and make themselves cereal. I'm not running around chasing them, worring about them finding the cleaning products under the sink cabinet or sticking objects in the electric outlets.

It's also nice to know that I'm still young and I won't be super old when my children get married and have children of their own and maybe I'll actually see a great grandchild.

Oh, and the coolest shit always comes out wayyyy after you have had your own kids. This is why it's good to spoil others children ;)
I think their both reversible Jylie. I wouldn't put Jeremy through that kinda torture "down there" ever again though!
We wanted to have kids early so we wouldn't be all old and shit by the time they were grown and on their own. I always said I'd be done when I was 25 and I stuck to it.

....and yeah. ALL kindsa cool shit out there for kids....well for parents that have babies/toddlers....Like the bungo seat or what the hell ever they are....they're AWESOME!
Maybe you can borrow one from the Duggars, they're about to have their 19th. They wouldn't even notice.
Lana said…
you can borrow my baby anytime you feel like it. anytime, really. i'll even ship her....
Send her on Lana! Well, as long as it's not C.O.D.
Stereos:

No thanks on the crazy Duggars! I definitely don't wanna get infected with whatever the hell they got!

Popular posts from this blog

Because I'm TOTALLY Awesome Like That!

Today I was checkin' out the Cake Wrecks Blog and it was about my favoritist feline EVER (actually the only feline I like)...... HELLO KITTY ! WOW, there are some pretty shit cakes out there claiming to be Hello Kitty cakes. One even looks like Porky the freakin' Pig. The very last cake she wrote about tough is a cake I have worshiped forEVER . The first time I saw the HK zombie cake was on this site called Hello Kitty Hell which was a site I learned of when a friend of mine had sent me an email saying she'd seen one of my tattoos online. At first I thought "WHAT!?!?!? Really? Which one? Are they makin' fun of the big ass nekkid blue fairy that covers my ENTIRE back?" No, it couldn't be....no one even sees that tattoo.....ever. I clicked the link she had sent me and it took me to a fantastic place called Hello Kitty Hell . Wha? I ain't ever seen this place before! The dude who writes it says he's married to a crazed maniac of a wife that must h...

13 Roses 13 Dollar Tattoos!

Y'all have been lookin' for it and here it is! Yes , 13 Roses in Atlanta is gonna have another $13 tattoo (plus lucky $7 tip!) this upcoming Friday the 13th! Turn one of the unluckiest days of the year into your lucky day! You got a $20 bill, you gotta tattoo...... Q & A What does $20 get you? A kick ass tattoo by a kick ass artist. On the 13th, the shop will put on the front door a sheet of paper that has the tattoos you can choose from. Don't expect a half sleeve dipshit. It's a $20 tattoo!!! See that 13 on my arm? That's what I got last time..... ....and this taco (mmmm tacos)....it's what I got another time..... and that shit's a coupon at Holy Taco in East Atlanta....yep....a coupon. Does it just cost $13 for the tattoo? No asshat.....it's $13 tattoos with a $7 tip......$20. You got more than 2o dolla....tip more. Can I pick any tattoo I want? N o. Like I said before....they'll post a sheet of paper with what you can choose from on the front...

In the Car

Everyday this week, I've had to bring the kids to work with me. Since they're completely terrified of me (psht), they've kept their little kid selves in line. On the way to work this morning, the girl taught the boy how to hand crochet. He was pretty hesitant at first, because "boys don't do that kinda crap"....that's until she told him of her grand plan to make 'em and sell 'em to the people I work with. The second money was involved, he was all in. In less than 10 minutes, he was well on his way to making his first hand crocheted scarf. It's amazing what can get accomplished in the hour and a half it takes to get to work. By the time we arrived, the boy had completed his very first scarf. All I can seem to get accomplished is drinking coffee..... Mmmm.....Starbucks. I totally thought I was over it. I was wrong. So, how is the girl's grand plan goin' you might be wondering. Uh yeah.....she's made $32 so far. As for the boy,...