Wednesday, May 6, 2009

I'm a Total Freakin' Nag

I only want the best for my kids. I don't want them goin' out into the big boy world without a clue as to how to handle themselves. I hope that they learn from watching. That they think, ok....that's the way Mom and Dad do things, that's the way I'll do things.

The girl pretty much gets it. At her age, she could probably out live me if she found herself lost in the jungle. The boy, he's an entirely different story. So many people tell me, "It's just a boy thing, he'll grow out of it". Hell yeah he'll grow out of it, I'm gonna make damn sure of that! However, in doing that I've realized that I'm a big fat pain in the ass nag. It hit me last night......

Last night I saw that the boys nails were so long he coulda picked my nose from across the room. This has been a problem we've struggled with for a long time and I'm tired of having to say anything about it. I had gotten so tired of seeing him with long nails that I painted them a pretty pretty pink once. You'd have thought I was pulling his fingernails off with pliers the way he reacted, but did that change anything? Does he cut his nails regularly? Hell no!
I was about to open my mouth and say something to him last night, but instead I decided to keep my mouth shut and wait until he left the room so I could tell his dad it was his turn to be the nag.
Let's cut to this morning.
The boy opens up his two packages of grits. He leaves the top part that he ripped off on the counter along with about half a bag of grits that had spewed everywhere. Did he clean it up? No. I go on to tell him he can't leave trash and food on the counter and all the reasons why not.
As I'm saying all this to him, I notice he has a filthy shirt on. I say to him " get that shirt out of the dirty clothes?" He says "no, it was hanging on my wall". Ok, that's a little weird, but whatever. I go on to tell him he can't wear a filthy shirt to school and all the reasons why not.
As he's smelling his shirt to see if it actually smells dirty, he lifts up his arm to get a wiff of the pits and I notice he smells vaguely like tacos. So, that means he didn't put on deodorant......again. We've been working on this one for like three years now and he still doesn't give a crap whether or not he's known as the stinky kid in class. Ok. Whatever. At this point I'm totally freakin' over it, but still ask if he's remembered to put on deodorant. He says "GAH!" and stomps off up the stairs and I'm all "Ok, Napoleon Dynamite, why you wanna be all stompin' on the stairs and stuff? They didn't do anything to you".
While he's upstairs putting on deodorant, I put a kettle on to boil and run to the bathroom. While I was in the bathroom the kettle started to whistle....and whistle....and whistle. Normally if I can't get to it, the girl will yell "MOM! Tea's done....and she'll turn the stove off". This morning, the girl was already at school. So the kettle went on whistling, all the while the boy was standing in the kitchen watching his grits go round in the microwave. Holy jesus.....I finally got to the kettle. I turned it off and stood there eyeballin' my kid. He says "What?".....I just shake my head and make my damn tea.
I hate constantly nagging the boy. HATE IT and I know he hates me for it. If he'd just pay attention and do what he should do, I wouldn't have to say anything. I just don't want to be responsible for a child of mine being an adult who has a filthy roach infested house and walks around with pretty pretty girl nails wearing dirty clothes and smellin' like tacos.
He just won't listen! How the hell am I supposed to teach him all this without being a total freakin' nag? DAMMIT!


Not So Average Mama said...

He will get it one day....

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