Does ANYBODY Even Read This???

First, let me say my regular post is just below and here is a preview......

HOWEVER, you must first read this before you get to THAT!

I started this blog to showcase my crafty stuff, but that's such a teeny part of my life that it didn't last long. I love to write. A lot. I used to do it all the time and had kinda forgotten about it until I realized I could use my blog to do it. I got a lot of retarded stuff in my brain and I really just need to get some of it out so I can fill it with more crap and it's a bonus that I can get it out there for people to read.

Anyhow, I can know that people look at my blog and a few little details about each of you because of the tracker thingy, but I wanna know who you are! SO, leave me a comment and tell me! Tell me anything. Randomness can so make a person's day.

Just to give you a little further incentive, I will randomly pick a few people and send you something totally ridiculous (if you'll give up your address that is) as a thanks for letting me know who you are. Hell, you can even stay anonamous, just leave me a comment! BUT, if you want an awesome and probably cheap surprise, just leave your email address in the comment (I totally won't spam you, that's shit's lame). I don't have any fancy randomness picker thing, so I will close my eyes and pick. I might even send something to everyone...I'm in a pretty giving mood these days.

Now, tell me who you are! Just leave me a random comment sometime this week (11-25 thru 11-30 only) with your email address and I'll get in touch with you for your address. It only takes a second....C'Mon, you know you want something awesome sent to you!

Thanks and YOU have an awesome day!

Fine Print......

I curse anyone that reads this and doesn't leave me a comment with poop soup for THREE WHOLE DAYS! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!

After you leave a comment you MUST read about this......

Oops! I Did It Again!

I wrecked my car.....again. Just a fender bender this time. I was in that awesome after work bumper to bumper traffic on the highway. I sneezed....and I sneezed again and again and then a snot rocket flew outta my nose. As I go to wipe the hangin' snot outta my nose....BAM. I hit a car. What really sucked was when I hit the car my snot covered hand slid up and smeared on the lense of my glasses. Awesome. Just fuckin' awesome and to top it all off, I got another ticket. I get home and I'm all pissy and shit. Jeremy says "Why you so pissy?" Uh, HELLO? I just wrecked my stupid fuckin' car! He says, "you're not used to that by now?" Admittedly, I've had a few problems with bumpin' into cars and other things here and there, but dang....it ain't like it's ever my fault. Psht. Like this one time, the girl was in the backseat and needed a kleenex. I turned around to gave one to her. I hit a car. It was dead stopped at a red light. ...

APB....Little Jimmy is Missing!!!

It's December 1st and Little Jimmy shoulda made his first appearance at the house this morning. Evidently, I hid Little Jimmy so good that last time last year that even I can't find him. This is no bueno. Little Jimmy is an Elf on the Shelf . We read the book, he shows up in a different spot every morning and watches and reports back to Santa every night. Seriously. The boy gets it. He knows. The elf ain't nothin' but a stuffed doll. The girl....she still believes. She was snoopin' around a week or so ago and found the book that Little Jimmy is SUPPOSED to be stuffed in after Christmas and said "Mom! Little Jimmy's not in his book! He's gone back to the North Pole to get all his instructions!" "Dammit. She STILL believes in Little Jimmy", I remember thinkin'. I mean really, you try comin' up with 30 different hidin' spots for a little elf that won't take your kids more than a few minutes to find every mornin...

What an Asshole

Awesome. That's what I am. So awesome that I'm featured on Cooking for Asshole's blog and I didn't have to pay him one penny. Not that he's anything special, but at least he recognizes me for all of my awesomeness....even though he totally talks shit about me and says something about me being Japanese just because I couldn't my panties on right one day...psht....what an asshole. Despite the fact that he's an asshole, he writes one of my favorite blogs . He thinks we're all stupid and suck ass at cookin '. He will berate you and belittle you and cook a pork roast at the same time. Be aware though....he cooks a bunch vegetarian hippie shit......claiming his wife's a vegetarian....I think meat just gives him the shits so he doesn't make a lot of it. If you're one of them beer drinkers, this Asshole thinks he's some sorta beer connoisseur (I say he's just a drunk). He drinks all kinds weird shit. I mean really, why not just sit do...

'Cuz I Felt Like It!

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